I talk honestly and openly about my experiences with mental illness, fibromyalgia, and chronic fatigue syndrome through the lens of feminism, fat acceptance and process theology. I also do recipe and book reviews. My mission is to spread the message that hope is always real for a better life, despite living in a world that is often very harsh.

Friday, February 20, 2009

So Happy! I have a job!


Well, I was going to do a clever post about Cosmo, but that's for another day... I'm too excited about my own current events right now! I have a job! It's a full-time job with health benefits! I'm so excited I want to go dancing and I want to paint and sing and laugh really loud all at once!

I'll be working at Discovery Mall, which is just down the road, at an Outlet Sears selling clothes. $8.50 an hour! Full-time! With benefits!

If I do really well, then I could move up to appliances, which would be on commission and it all would add up to approximately 10-12 dollars an hour!

I get to work during the day and I'll still be able to go/play at church and attend NAMI. Really, really happy! Talking about NAMI-I got a message from one of the members about upcoming elections for board members and she said to call if I wanted to run and I'm thinking maybe?... Elections aren't until the first week of April, so I've got some time to think about it. I'd like for there to be more creativity in the group and for us to be more visual. Then again, I haven't been a member that long, so maybe I should wait and make sure that I settle into this job well first.

This issue does have a feminist slant to it, actually. My boss is a young (I think she's in her thirties) African-American woman. Score! She seems really nice and to have a good business-sense, but the best part of all is that because of this I don't feel as nervous about working in retail as I did previously. The Sears I'm working is relatively new to having clothes and the other main worker in that section is also a woman. This is very important to me, as I had two male customers that would sometimes come to JCPenney's and sexually harass me when I worked there and I didn't exactly know how to handle it. I did my best to keep things strictly business, but I always felt like my supervisor wouldn't quite understand my concerns about them, for my supervisor was a man who made me extremely nervous. He could be quite rude and condescending and even though he's in his fifties and has a severe hunched back, I would catch him flirting with the female customers in a way that sometimes seemed a bit odd to me. I hated working with him around me.

One thing you need to understand about me-it is not hard to make me nervous. I have schizoaffective disorder and people with this disorder get stressed out incredibly easily AND when they do, the stress manifests itself in ways that are similar to schizophrenia-hallucinations, delusions, paranoia, etc. AND obsessive compulsive behavior, hence the eating disorder. I, of course, take medication and I have learned a lot of coping skills, but it sucks all the same.

Transitions are hard and it took me a little while for my emotions to begin to normalize after returning home and giving up my preconceived notions of what I should be doing. I'm still sad, but I'm much calmer now. I am hopeful. I don't have to do this job forever, but it seems like a job with a fair bit of security, which I need right now. I feel safer and with guaranteed benefits and full-time hours, much more valued too.

I needed this. Safety. Security. Female empowerment. Last year was hard, but things are evening out. Godde of the Universe, thank you,- for my soul is happy!

1 comment:

  1. Hi, thanks for your comment. I appreciate your opinion and concern, and understand exactly what you're saying. But I think you're misunderstanding the situation here... I'm not trying to "control" her or giving myself stress, but I know it is God who has touched me to pray for her. I don't force her to come to church or anything, but am continuously praying for her and believing that God will work His grace one day. I can't do much except pray, and I think this is an experience God has blessed me with as I know one of the most important lesson He wants me to learn is the power and effectiveness of prayer.
    Anyway, I'm happy for you too! YAY for your new job, and may you really enjoy every single moment there and discover God's blessings in it!

    ReplyDelete